You have decided, unequivocally, that you want to have an Ecstatic experience birthing your baby!
You are moving through the first essential key to an Ecstatic Birth, awakening your consciousness … you get that there is an entire alternate paradigm of birthing. You are turned on and ready and excited.
But where do you begin?
How can you prepare for an Ecstatic Birth?
What practitioners should you hire?
Where should you give birth?
What do you actually DO while giving birth?
What should you bring to your birth?
Who should be there?
The questions are endless and how does a mama even begin to navigate all of this?
It can be very overwhelming. And then there is the question of time… with a due date that marches closer each day.
For many women that awaken to the desire for an Ecstatic Birth and begin to get conscious around what that means (link) it can feel as if there is a wide chasm between where she stands and where she wants to be.
How do you bridge the chasm?
This is a pivotal moment.
The concept of Ecstatic Birthing is so foreign to most women that their first inclination is to laugh, roll their eyes, and completely dismiss the idea.
Each time I ask a room of women the first word that comes to mind when I say childbirth, 99% of them say pain.
How could giving birth possibly be pleasurable? It seems like everyone knows that it is one of the most painful experiences a woman could have.. right?
That is the level of consciousness that most of us (including me) have been raised with, a fact that stems directly from our religious and cultural inheritance. Remember Eve?
That is how deep our roots go around the paradigm of women suffering in birth.. way way back to the Garden of Eden.
The other side of the story- women who enjoy their birth experiences, who experience rapture, bliss, or even orgasm while birthing their children has been almost completely silenced. To speak of such things would be blasphemous… or even obscene.
The first essential key to Ecstatic Birthing is Consciousness.
It is time to wake up from the paradigm of “no pain no gain” in our births and in our lives. It is time to take responsibility for our experience and consciously create what we want.
There are five levels to getting conscious in preparing for an Ecstatic Birth:
How can we support a birth to progress with as much ease as possible?
There are many many tools an expectant mama and her support team can use. On the natural side- movement, massage and water can be incredibly supportive of the progression of labor.
Right now, I want to focus on how you can best holistically support the natural process of birth with PLEASURE.
You read that right. Pleasure.
Pleasure is the most holistic birthing tool there is.
How is that possible when 90% of women associate birth with pain? Well, your birthing body and your sexual body are one and the same.
When I first launched Ecstatic Birth, I wanted to support a woman like I was at the beginning of my journey.
…a woman who wanted to have an incredible birth experience, but didn’t know what that meant or where to begin.
I do attract a lot of these women, but I am always surprised to see so many of you practitioners on my list, in my programs, on my calls.
I’ll be totally honest– I’ve felt very hexed by that. I’m completely upfront and honest in sharing that I have no medical or birth credentials in any way and yet you all still kept coming with enthusiasm to receive what I’ve been sharing. Thank you.
And thank you for sharing with me time and time again how much you want to integrate this with your client work. Thank you for helping me see that this was not included in any of your formal trainings, that this is as new and progressive to you as it is to the expectant mamas I work with.
I’m launching my first ever birth practitioner training this fall.
“Why do most people tend to birth in pain rather than in pleasure?”
This is the question I am asked most often when I share about Ecstatic Birth. There isn’t just one answer to this, but a whole host of answers.
I’ve compiled what I see as the top 10 major factors women birth in pain as opposed to pleasure.
Some of them may surprise you…
10. It is our religious inheritance. Remember when Eve took a bite of that apple in the Garden of Eden? Womankind’s punishment for her sin was to suffer through childbirth. To birth any other way would be blasphemous.
9. It is our cultural inheritance. Look at all the messages around us- How does the media depict birth? How do the moms around you talk about birth? Overwhelmingly our cultural messages reinforce the idea that birth hurts. Women who have had alternate experiences are often ashamed to speak up and if they do, risked being ostracized or outcast, especially if they speak of experiencing pleasure during birth.
8. We are stuck in our heads. In modern society, our bodies are primarily a means to get our heads from place to place. Mental, rational intelligence is valued above all others and yet you can’t think your way through birth. Birth is a primal full body experience. We must be able to let go of rational thought and get fully into our bodies, feeling each sensation, and be guided by its wisdom.
7. We don’t trust our bodies. In this age of cancer there is an underlying current of fear that our bodies will betray us despite our best intentions. Our bodies seem do things we can’t control and don’t understand yet this is all a symptom of our grand disconnect from ourselves. Our bodies are so wise. They hold primal wisdom, generational wisdom, experiential wisdom, all in addition to our mental rational wisdom. If we can learn to listen and honor that it would change everything.