Blog Post

A simple strategy to elevate your birth experience

Childbirth can be deeply empowering, pleasurable, ecstatic and even orgasmic.

Yet most women experience the opposite.

There is a HUGE  gap between the possibility and the reality.

The gap is not whether or not Ecstatic Births actually exist.

The gap is in how we are raised, our relationships to our bodies, the structures of training and support that exist (or not) for women, the healthcare system, the legal system and so much more.

I see so so many women judging themselves harshly or feeling down in the dumps for not “achieving” this ideal.

That is the heart of the matter right there–

Ecstatic Birth is an IDEAL and ideals are not a measure by which to judge ourselves, but a source of inspiration, elevation.

The last thing I want is the idea of an Ecstatic Birth to become another thing for women to feel compelled to achieve.

That negativity is our culture of perfectionism speaking through a woman’s body and it has got to stop.

To be bluntly honest, it is also is completely counter to everything I teach.

Pleasure thrives on approval.

Celebration of every drop magnifies and expands the sensation of pleasure.

While bringing the image of the picture perfect birth you have in your mind into reality is incredibly difficult,  (when does life ever conform perfectly to our ideals?) elevating your experience of birth is astoundingly simple.

Let me show you what I mean via this fool-proof 3 step strategy:

  1. Enjoying your birth experience begins with the idea that it is possible to experience pleasure in birth. You must believe that it is a journey WORTHY of being enjoyed. While it may seem obvious that the birth of your child is an occasion that is inherently worthy of enjoyment, our cultural and religious and social contracts all dictate otherwise. To experience pleasure in childbirth you must believe it is possible and be willing to have an experience that deviates from the norm.
  2. Pay close attention to what brings the sensation of pleasure into your body. What stimuli give you pleasure– what kind of touch, what images, what scents? Sounds? Tastes?…  Notice the conditions under which you are receptive to the sensation of pleasure.  Notice what conditions amplify your feelings of pleasure.
  3. Incorporate as many of these as possible into your birth and you will, without fail, have a much more enjoyable experience birthing your child than you otherwise would have. This is true regardless of your birth outcome, regardless of any twist on turns along the way.

Astoundingly simple, I know. But that is really all it takes

These 3 steps are all you need to elevate your birth experience, to experience pleasure and call in pleasure.

Pleasure is the most holistic birthing tool there is. Incorporating it into your birth supports you and the flow of your labor on so many levels and at the very least– even if you didn’t have that [fill in the ideal birth of your dreams here] you will have experienced moments of enjoyment along the way!

Of course there is so much more you can do to prepare to expand and augment pleasure in the body and often the most effective of those things are deeply personal to you and your desires and circumstances.

For those of you that have appetite to consciously elevate your birth plans and experience, I’m opening a limited number of slots this month for complimentary Training Strategy Sessions.

Based on your unique desires and circumstances, we will identify the one practice or course of action that you can implement that will further elevate your birth experience and open the doorway for pleasure.

We will also create a training protocol for you to prepare for your Ecstatic Birth.

You can schedule your Ecstatic Birth Pleasure Training Strategy session here.


Welcome! I'm Sheila Kamara Hay

I’m passionate about providing you with inspiration, practices and resources for your highest pleasure in life and birth!

Begin here:
Much love,
Sheila Signature

PS:  You deserve to have an empowering and pleasurable birth experience and so does your baby!

Currently enrolling:


Revolutionary combination of information, mindset shifts, tools and practices to prepare for PLEASURE in childbirth!!  O BABY! is the very heart of my work, the distillation of all my training and research in one very potent and sexy package!

O BABY! is everything I wish I would have known when preparing for my first birth– the very things that could have prevented my traumatic birth (and support you in creating your ECSTATIC Birth!) ????

Expectant and Future Mamas, read on….

EB - Gold Divider


EB - Essential Keys
Free Masterclass

Essential Keys to Ecstatic Birth


It’s time to turn everything you’ve been told about childbirth upside down and inside out. Get instant access to this FREE masterclass to learn more about the PLEASURE available to you in birth and how to access it.