The day your baby is born is one of the most momentous days of your life. Childbirth can be one of the most transformative ecstatic experiences in a woman’s life.
Unfortunately, that is not the typical experience our society is serving up in labor and delivery. Most women emerge from childbirth in a haze, many of them unconscious victims of trauma (as I was). We accept this because that is what we are taught childbirth is meant to be, culturally, religiously, and societally. If we make the same choices as everyone around us, this is what we will usually get.
To have a different experience, a woman must be willing to make different choices, to prepare with her mind, body and soul in a different direction. Ecstatic Births are not the norm (yet) and so it requires a certain ferocity to forge a different path.
My mind can be so serious. If there is a problem, let’s discuss it, think about it, tackle it, fight. I tried arguing with the hospital staff during my first birth and learned that fighting leads to nowhere but pain and trauma.
I got wiser with my second and really thought about the issues, support, preparation, learning to surrender. I consciously created space for my mind to melt and my body to take over. That birth was much better.
My third birth was all about pleasure. Due to a sluggish labor, I started dancing. I danced that little girl down through my body and ecstasy replaced pain as my partner. Dance is one of the most sacred paths from maidenhood to motherhood.
Who knew dance could be so powerful?
Who knew pleasure is a force to be reckoned with???
Right now, 1 in 3 women on the planet will be beaten or raped during her lifetime.
This is serious stuff.
This coming Thursday, on Valentine’s Day, I will join ONE BILLION RISING a revolution of women and men who will WALK OUT, DANCE, RISE UP, and DEMAND an end to violence against women and girls.
Recently, I was telling a friend about Ecstatic birth and I noticed that she had a dubious look on her face.
When I questioned her she asked- “So, you’re trying to teach women that they can ENJOY childbirth?”
Yes. I nodded, smiling. She shook her head condescendingly. “Well, that’s an oxymoron.”
Her reaction is totally understandable, given our cultural messages around birth, the endless TV shows depicting a birthing woman as a shrieking object waiting to be rescued by the doctor or drugs. Given the medicalization of birth, women are more likely to be trading birth war stories, than sharing tales of birth as a pleasurable empowering experience.
I’m totally thrilled to announce that things are changing.
The Ecstatic Birth Body Series has officially lauched- and our first session was absolutely stunning. Sheri Winston blew the socks off the participants with her tour of a Woman’s anatomy and all the connections she drew between the sexual and birthing processes. I received so many acknowledgments from participants like this FB post: “First class of the Body Series and I’m already a whole new woman. The bliss door is open!!” I am so proud of this baby being born, of myself for the part I play in its creation and nurture and growth. And yet, when the session ended, I was trembling head to toe. Trembling with an overwhelming feeling of SHAME. Shame. Can you believe it?
Oh my, ladies. Birth, it cracks you wide open. It has the potential to be the deepest most profound healing experience of your life. It is a rite of passage, no doubt, to support your growth into becoming the mother you need to be for your child. And the shame? We live in a world that doesn’t understand sexuality as sacred…
You will never guess where I am-
I’m cringing as I write this…
That is right. I am on vacation. And right now, my whole being is fully resisting sharing this information with you. Why? Because I just announced the details of the upcoming Ecstatic Birth Body Series. There is much work to be done. Shouldn’t I be taking this a whole lot more seriously? I mean, last time, I barely left my computer’s side and ran myself totally ragged getting ready. Shouldn’t I be doing that again?